Reinventing my Heart

Imagine the stages of a baby being formed in his/her mother's womb. How it took time for that child to grow before entering a new life. This is how I want to describe what my heart is doing. The pain of heartbreak shattered my heart yes, but time liquefied it. Making my heart pliable so that it could be molded into something new, and ready for a new beginning. I don't even know if that makes sense or if I sound crazy, but when I think of trying to fix a shattered heart, I think of taking those pieces and trying to put back together the heart you used to have. And I feel like for so long, I was trying to do that. I was trying to reconnect the pieces of my heart together because I longed to be the old me again. That fresh-hearted girl without a doubt in her mind. To be honest, I still try to do that. I treat my heart like it's a puzzle: trying to figure out which piece of the old me goes where. When it's only caused me so much more pain and confusion because I'm not that girl anymore. I'm not the girl who was so in love with nameless, who trusted him with all of the heart she used to have. Nameless isn't the same guy I used to love, so why am I trying to put back together the same heart I had for him?

I've come to the conclusion that it's not about putting back those pieces. It's about taking those pieces throwing them into a hot kiln (think about melting glass) and making something new out of them. 

Until next time.